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Thread: Ask Dr. Ecchi

  1. #601
    Id.
    Id. is offline Member Frequent Poster
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    Wow. Good to see that this thread is still alive and always with useful information! Those questions now comes more from curiosity on my part.


    My first question is, since women have a relatively short refractory period compared to men, according to what I read, how many orgasms can a woman have, one after another?

    The other question would be related to the only type of sex that wasn't discussed in here (or so I think. Couldn't find anything related to it): anal sex. About it, the questions that I have are:

    - Is it really good as people paint it? (for both men and women);
    - Most things I have heard from women's comments is that it hurts like hell. If that is true, what are the necessary preparations to make it less painful and more enjoyable for her?

  2. #602
    ECCHIKING is offline Senior Member Frequent Poster
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    Quote Originally Posted by Id. View Post
    Wow. Good to see that this thread is still alive and always with useful information! Those questions now comes more from curiosity on my part.


    My first question is, since women have a relatively short refractory period compared to men, according to what I read, how many orgasms can a woman have, one after another?

    The other question would be related to the only type of sex that wasn't discussed in here (or so I think. Couldn't find anything related to it): anal sex. About it, the questions that I have are:

    - Is it really good as people paint it? (for both men and women);
    - Most things I have heard from women's comments is that it hurts like hell. If that is true, what are the necessary preparations to make it less painful and more enjoyable for her?
    I'd guess only 2 within a small time i've never heard of more then 2 but i never look up these sort of things. xP

    Anal sex: I'm not sure on the men side i guess it's all if you're into that sort of thing but for women yes it is that good. I hear the anus has more nerve endings so that probably gives you a good picture in terms of feeling it.

    Not sure if you can lessen the pain for the first few times. Just go slow and MAKE SURE YOU'RE LUBED UP! Don't go in dry... >.<

  3. #603
    senile_seinen is offline Senior Member Regular
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    Quote Originally Posted by Id. View Post
    My first question is, since women have a relatively short refractory period compared to men, according to what I read, how many orgasms can a woman have, one after another?
    That's all over the map. Sometimes she only wants one. Sometimes she can only manage one (if any). Sometimes she can have so many that you both lose count. It all depends on a lot of things. Different women have different responses, and the same woman has different responses on different days and in different circumstances. My experience is that the average young woman can manage an average of three during an unhurried session. But the variability is immense.

    Quote Originally Posted by Id. View Post
    The other question would be related to the only type of sex that wasn't discussed in here (or so I think. Couldn't find anything related to it): anal sex. About it, the questions that I have are:

    - Is it really good as people paint it? (for both men and women);
    - Most things I have heard from women's comments is that it hurts like hell. If that is true, what are the necessary preparations to make it less painful and more enjoyable for her?
    Is it as good? Well, if you're a guy with a small penis and you feel inadequate/dissed by all of womanhood, then yeah, you'll love the tight fit and feeling of power and subjugation.

    For guys without such kinks, it's not such a big deal as long as you aren't riding the neighborhood bicycle.

    Most women don't get that much out of it, and it pretty universally hurts. Unless she has a thing for pain, or it actually really does rock her world, don't count on her saying yes to the idea. Oh, and remember that pornos have the same relationship to sex that professional wrestling has to sports...

    How to make it hurt less: 1. she has to be relaxed. Very relaxed. Consider getting her somewhat drunk first. 2. Use some of the silicone-based lube homosexual men use. 3. go very slow, and start off with fingers. See my post on proper finger maintenance.
    Not really the love+hate god, but the pic (from Midori no Hibi) is just too funny... Blog? Yeah.

  4. #604
    Mochiko_chan88 is offline Junior Member Newbie
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    Thanks for all your guys' advice about my then insecure partner, a few pages back. I'm happy to report that he was great, there were no problems. We took a slow start and we gradually worked our way up, when we were comfortable. I've been enjoying the progression
    The alcohol advice worked great - it was probably the best sex so far. We only had a few drinks each.
    Lately I've been growing more curious about the idea of cunnilingus. Do you guys have any advice about making me feel more comfortable, and any technique advice for my partner?

    (On that note: I've experimented with altering the taste of my cum, back when I first received cunnilingus. I've found that drinking lots of water and eating only really sugary or sweet foods makes the cum more diluted and actually taste sweet. If your gf's are up for it, try it out, see if it works for you too.)

  5. #605
    ECCHIKING is offline Senior Member Frequent Poster
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mochiko_chan88 View Post
    Thanks for all your guys' advice about my then insecure partner, a few pages back. I'm happy to report that he was great, there were no problems. We took a slow start and we gradually worked our way up, when we were comfortable. I've been enjoying the progression
    The alcohol advice worked great - it was probably the best sex so far. We only had a few drinks each.
    Lately I've been growing more curious about the idea of cunnilingus. Do you guys have any advice about making me feel more comfortable, and any technique advice for my partner?

    (On that note: I've experimented with altering the taste of my cum, back when I first received cunnilingus. I've found that drinking lots of water and eating only really sugary or sweet foods makes the cum more diluted and actually taste sweet. If your gf's are up for it, try it out, see if it works for you too.)
    Quote Originally Posted by senile
    You know, I'd love to be able to write a step-by-step for this that always worked. Since nobody else has, I'd be assured of wealth. I am forced to admit, however, that my (limited) experience has shown that women vary greatly both across the population and over time in their preference for particular sorts of erotic stimulation.

    Here's what I've generally observed to be true:

    1) Don't start off anywhere near the clitoris. Yes, it's the love button. No, you can't make her happy by immediately going there. For an analogy, imagine that your intimate friend started off by petting the head of your penis and ignoring everything else. See? Too sensitive.

    2) This is a learning experience. Chances are excellent that if you're asking questions like this, you have limited experience with this in general and with your partner in particular. Since all women are different, you're on a voyage of discovery every time you bed a new girl. This is one reason I was usually hooked up, but not a player in school - I wanted to have lots of fun with somebody, and it's just not possible to do that without getting up the individual learning curve of that particular woman. Corrolary: one-night-stands aren't the best loving.

    3) Since it's a learning experience, you need to engage all your senses. Do the candle light thing so that you can see. Yeah, it's romantic too, but it's also highly practical. If you can't see, you won't learn anything from your eyes. Get your head down there even if you're not sure what to do with your tongue and lips. For one thing, your breath is arousing, for another, you can see what's there a lot better than you can feel it, and for a third, well, you should never put your tool anywhere you wouldn't put your tongue anyway.

    She'll smell like her. That's fine. It's usually a strong scent, but not objectionable. You smell like you down there, too, and men are generally smellier... If she smells like the fish market at closing time, consider suggesting a coed shower (bet she was wearing pantyhose), or maybe you picked a dirty girl who'll give you a bigger gift than you wanted. Never, ever, ever tell a woman she doesn't smell as sweet as a spring breeze down there. Just adjust your choice of action to deal with the reality. If she's within ten days either side of ovulation, bathed today, and hasn't sweated much since, she'll smell female, but not unpleasant. The Japanese have the near-universal custom of bathing immediately before sex. I'm not a big fan, because I believe (like the French) that a woman should smell like herself instead of bathing supplies. If everybody's stinky, sweaty and smoky from clubbing or whatever, then the road to the bed should lead through the shower for both of you, preferably together. Believe me - there aren't many more fun things in the world than rubbing soap suds over a nude woman...

    4) OK, so you're checking out the real estate. Presumably you've been stroking her torso, nuzzling around her breasts and neck, etc beforehand so she's already pretty enthusiastic. You kiss your way down her torso and put a hand flat between her navel and pubic bone. This is your seismometer. You'll feel when she takes a breath, and you'll feel when she squirms. Useful information. It's not a bad way to start off by kissing the insides of her thighs.

    5) it's all about the personal variation: some women have small outer labia, some have big ones that obscure things. Some have an invisible clitoris, some have a large one (large here still pretty small). Some have a prominent hood, some don't. Don't worry, they've all got the same number of nerve endings somewhere down there, there's just variation in the distribution. Your mission is to find the nerve endings and make them happy.

    Again, think about what feels good to your penis. soft, smooth and gentle is the order of the day, until she gets wound up and ready for more. Your mouth happens to be equipped with a decent lubricant which will do a good job softening your fingers. Oh, by the way - fingernails should be as short as you can stand and any pointy bits or rough spots should be filed down. Likewise, consider putting some massage oil or hand cream on to soften your manly callouses. You need to maximize your sense of touch, and to use the lightest caresses possible, especially when you get near the clitoris and inner labia.

    6) If you find something she likes, she'll likely make a happy noise. The bad news is that most young women, most of the time are afraid of sounding loose/wanton/whatever or are just embarrased. So don't expect a lot of audible evidence. That's why the hand below her navel is so useful - you can feel what you can't hear. When you find something good, she'll probably gasp a little. Make sure it's a happy gasp, then find the gentlest way to repeat the same thing. Explore a little and see if you can get a bigger gasp.

    7) sexual excitement correlates with lubrication. If you're doing the right things, she'll get damper. And when she's really interested, her scent will change (generally milder). Play around the damp areas with a moistened index finger. Remember-fingernails are bad. The perineum is often quite sensitive. Once you figure out what she likes fiddled with, it is probably time to introduce your tongue and lips. I've generally had good results with keeping the finger in the neighborhood and augmenting with the mouth.

    when you really get her wound up (could be five minutes, could be 20), she'll get more lubricated and will get the female version of an erection (Yes, it really happens-there's erectile tissue beneath the labia that open up the entrance to the vagina). You'll feel more tension in her legs and abdominal muscles and her respiration will be shorter and faster. She'll probably start to perspire a little.

    9) At this point, it's probably time for your finger to boldly go (gently, actually) where you hope other parts will be later. Angle things so that the nail isn't rubbing against anything. The tissue in there is as soft as the inside of your mouth, and doesn't like roughness any better. The ring around the opening is sensitive - explore it with the pad on your finger. If she has a hymen, you'd be wise to keep getting her as excited as possible up before you try to stretch it.

    10) generally, the most sensitive part of the vagina is the area just below the pubic bone. Your finger will detect a different texture there. This is the "g spot," and isn't usually a spot as such, but more like an area of different tissue. Explore it with the pad of your finger. Once you find a motion she likes, you can start working with your tongue around the clitoris and hood. Again, gentle is the key - remember that the upper surface of your tongue is actually rather raspy.

    11) if this is all going well, you'll soon have a new challenge. She'll probably start squriming so much that it's hard to keep finger and tongue where you want them. Ganbatte!

    That might just be as much as can be conveyed in writing. The principles remain the same: go slowly, pay attention, be patient, and be gentle. If she's inexperienced and doesn't masturbate, you might be at this for quite some time before you manage to rock her world.
    Found on page 31.

    Thanks for that info on the water & sugar. :O I'll try that with her.
    Last edited by ECCHIKING; 02-24-2008 at 09:35 PM.

  6. #606
    Mochiko_chan88 is offline Junior Member Newbie
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    oh wow xD I forgot senile already posted that step-by-step. Thanks for the repost, Ecchiking! And good luck on trying out my technique, hope it works for you guys

  7. #607
    Shinto-sensei-aki is offline Junior Member Newbie
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    yo i got a question to dr. eechi
    jau my gf always gets mad when i lick at her nipples she said it hurts but i
    dont think i make it to hard -.-
    hm.. gota some idea?
    jo srry for my bad english >.> buah*

  8. #608
    skadii is offline Junior Member Newbie
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    hiya i happend to have large breasts. Will they become smaller if i lose weight? they have always been large but i have also always been chunky. i recently gained some weight so i was thinking of starting to exercise.

  9. #609
    ECCHIKING is offline Senior Member Frequent Poster
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    Quote Originally Posted by skadii View Post
    hiya i happend to have large breasts. Will they become smaller if i lose weight? they have always been large but i have also always been chunky. i recently gained some weight so i was thinking of starting to exercise.
    Exercise is never a bad thing. Big boobs aren't always a bad thing either. Unless they're like H cup massive.

  10. #610
    senile_seinen is offline Senior Member Regular
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    Quote Originally Posted by Shinto-sensei-aki View Post
    yo i got a question to dr. eechi
    jau my gf always gets mad when i lick at her nipples she said it hurts but i
    dont think i make it to hard -.-
    hm.. gota some idea?
    jo srry for my bad english >.> buah*
    All boobie questions today, eh? They're certainly two of my favorite topics.

    Nipples vary in sensitivity depending on the woman and the time of month. Most young women, in my experience at least, tend to like indirect stimulation of the nipple and aureole more than direct stimulation. While it may not be as much fun for you to pet her through a t-shirt or bra, it may well be more fun for her. Just think about how soft her whole breast is. Her aureoles and nipples are even softer. The softer and thinner the skin, the more sensitive it is. Often it's really easy to overdo it and make her sore. Girls who always wear bras are even more sensitive there - their nipples aren't used to sun, air, and even the gentle friction of clothes rubbing against them is unfamiliar. Girls with very small breasts who go without a bra are frequently a lot happier to be played with a little more aggressively.

    Licking is especially tricky. Spit makes things softer. Since her nipples are already soft and sensitive, getting them wet and then rubbing your raspy tongue over them probably doesn't feel great for her.

    The good news is that if you can be gentle enough, you can probably please her by doing the right things with her breasts and nipples. As with any sort of intimate petting, soft, smooth clean hands, being clean-shaven, and having soft lips all help. I bet you never knew before that lip balm is a sex aid. Trust me on this one. Gentle kisses with soft lips in sensitive places will make her very happy. Likewise, gently petting her with soft hands helps a lot. Callouses may make you feel more manly, but they won't make her feel sexier toward you.

    If I'm getting serious about getting her interested in her body (and have plenty of time), I make sure the room is warm, interruptions are unlikely, and soften my hands up with massage oil before. If you want to relax her, it's hard to beat rubbing massage oil all over her, too. Get her calm and relaxed, rub oil all over her, and gently explore her with your sense of touch. You'll get oil on everything (you may want clean sheets when you're done), and it's lots of fun.

    The trick with massage oil is choose something with a milder scent than you think you want. The more warm skin is covered in this stuff, the stronger it smells. So pick one without much scent. Believe it or not, the best massage oils are based on plain-old extra-virgin olive oil with a scent added. If you like the smell of one but it's too strong, you can always dilute it with a good grade of olive oil. Incidentally, if you want to save money and skip the scent, the grocery store is the location to get the massage oil of choice...

    Quote Originally Posted by skadii View Post
    hiya i happend to have large breasts. Will they become smaller if i lose weight? they have always been large but i have also always been chunky. i recently gained some weight so i was thinking of starting to exercise.
    Breasts are mostly fat. If you lose fat, you'll lose some breast size. The good news is that you'll loose it from your belly at about the same rate that it comes off your breasts, so everything will stay in proportion as you get smaller. If your breasts are big enough that they bother you, excercise will definitely help with that.

    If you exercise and lose weight, your breasts will shrink, but they won't return to the shape they had before you got fatter. You'll probably have to buy some different sized bras once you get to a size you want to keep for a while. You'll probably lose some band size, and you'll certainly drop a cup size or two.

    Go ahead and get in shape. You'll feel better, you'll be happier with your looks, and you'll probably have more energy and feel perkier. It's all good.

    And @ecchiking - thanks for digging up that post on cunnilingus. I had the flu last week and wasn't up to posting for a while.

    Lastly - the sugar-water trick. The idea is pretty simple - semen is (believe it or not) mostly a combination of sperm fuel (sugar) and pH modifiers to keep the acid environment of the female vagina from killing the sperm. It makes sense that if you get aroused and drink some sugar water, your body is going to raid your blood sugar for some extra sperm fuel. I've heard of flavoring one's semen with other things by drinking them, but never just plain sugar before.

    So what does this have to do with women? Well,the g-spot is the female equivalent of the prostate gland. It gets its raw materials from the same place (her bloodstream) as the prostate does in a man. The same dietetic rules should apply.

    During one very memorable cunnilingus session, a girlfriend and I once discovered that enough hot food can make a girl spicy down there, too. I never thought of taco bell quite the same way afterward...
    Last edited by senile_seinen; 03-08-2008 at 12:53 PM.
    Not really the love+hate god, but the pic (from Midori no Hibi) is just too funny... Blog? Yeah.

 

 
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