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A bucket list of things to do at walmart...


1. Get boxes of condoms & randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.
2. Set all the alarm clocks to go off at 10-minute intervals.
3. Make a trail of orange juice on the floor to the rest rooms.
4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, "I think we have a code 3 in houseware," and see what happens.
5. Put some M&M's on lay away.
6. Move CAUTION WET FLOOR signs to carpet areas.
7. Set up a tent in the camping department, tell others you'll only invite them in if they bring pillows from the bedding department.
8. When someone asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why won't you people leave me alone."
9. Look right into the security camera and use it as a mirror while you pick your nose.
10. Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from 'Mission Impossible.'
11. While handling guns in the hunting department ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are.
12. Hide in the clothing rack and when people browse through whisper "PICK ME! PICK ME!!!!!"
13. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!"
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14. Ask an employee if you can try out a casket. Also ask if it has a guarantee.
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15. Test to see if the condom fits.
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16. Have a shopping cart derby.
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Would be fun if they have a hill inside the mart.
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17. Handle a gun or weaponry (which, btw, I never understood why the Mart had dedicated sections to) and use pinatas and dartboards for target practice.
18. Bring a bunch of batterized appliances from home and replace them with fresh batteries in the store.
19. Bring a friend and race on the bikes around the store, making motorcycle noises whille you do this.
20. Switch into new clothes in the changing room and hang your old clothes where the new clothes were.
21. Come into the store on halloween wearing a costume (like an M&M) to pick up a gun order purchase.
22. Stand behind one of the empty registers to 'process' customers.
Stolen Sig Count: 25
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23. Grab a shopping cart and put a shovel, a bag of lime, fertilizer, and a hatchet into the cart, then walk around the store giving people dirty looks.
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ahh the spider makes a comeback!
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24. try out one of the toilet pot by taking a dump in it.
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