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  1. #1
    cpr's Avatar
    cpr
    cpr is offline Super Moderator Community Builder
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    Default Burnnnnnnnn... want ice with that?

    http://www.fmylife.com/

    Gawd, I love this site. It's about true stories and all... very funny.

    Some of my favorites...
    Today, my parents met my boyfriends parents for the first time. Bailing us out of jail. FML
    Today, I kissed my girlfriend and she tasted like a cigarette. I don't smoke. She doesn't smoke. My roommate does. FML
    Today, my mom walked in on me looking at a 1978 playboy. She asked if I found it in the basement. I said yes. Then I realized she was the centerfold. FML
    your favs?

  2. #2
    Raszagal is offline Senior Member Community Builder
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    Today, I was complaining to my sister about how jealous I was of her looks. Her response was "Sometimes it's okay to be the ugly sister. Like, you have less of a chance of getting raped." FML

    Today, at the end of a really long day my boyfriend was rubbing my back. I told him I appreciated how sensitive he was being. His response? "I was just trying to figure out how to unhook your bra." FML
    They are pretty cruel some of them^

  3. #3
    BlueDemon is offline Senior Member Community Builder
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    Default

    Today, I drove to a job interview. I had to sneeze, but because I was driving on the highway, I didn't let go of the wheel to cover my mouth. I didn't know the sneeze was a "productive" one until I was sitting in the interview, looked down at my new blouse and saw the giant lugie sitting there. FML
    Damn xD That must suck yo

  4. #4
    Henchy432 is offline Senior Member Community Builder
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    Default

    Today, I arrived at my parents house for dinner. When I got there, I noticed that they had gay pride flags hanging from the porch, and gay rights bumper stickers plastered to their cars. There was also a huge "We accept you, Nick" banner hanging from the garage. I'M NOT GAY! FML
    Man, pure awesomeness.

  5. #5
    BlueDemon is offline Senior Member Community Builder
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    Today, my sister had a friend over and I had just gotten out of the shower. I wrapped something around me and walked across the living room. When I walked through, they both started laughing hysterically. Turns out, I grabbed a poncho and the hole for the head ended up right over my crotch. FML
    Oh Gawd,I lawled so hard xD

    This one too

    Today, I took my dog for a walk down by the river. I was throwing sticks for him with one hand and talking on the phone with the other. Then I accidentally threw my phone in the river instead of the stick and was standing there talking to the stick while my phone sat at the bottom of the river. FML
    Last edited by BlueDemon; 02-23-2009 at 11:24 AM.

  6. #6
    StealDragon's Avatar
    StealDragon is offline Super Moderator Community Builder
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    Default

    Reminds me of that site Overheard In New York.


    I'd like to die with the songs I love stuck in my head. I hope to make the most of these hollow bones we become.
    I raise a toast to the the souls that sang all along. I've been gathering friends to just to make some sounds,
    before the ship goes down, I've been making amends by making the rounds before the whole world ends


    [Chit Chat Specific Forum Rules] // Last Update - Friday March 13, 2009

  7. #7
    LarsDeman is offline Senior Member Long Time Member
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    Default

    Today, I received my passport in the mail. They got my birthdate wrong. Then I picked up my birth certificate that I had sent in with the application. Turns out my parents have been celebrating my birthday on the wrong day for 16 years. FML
    I laughed at that one... And realised that I really am an asshole.

  8. #8
    Raszagal is offline Senior Member Community Builder
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    Originally posted by SD
    Reminds me of that site Overheard In New York.
    Yeah, that was awesome^

  9. #9
    csuti's Avatar
    csuti is offline Senior Member Community Builder
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    Today, I went to the Doctor with my parents. When the doctor asked if I was sexually active, I said 'Yes.' My mom laughed and said 'Good one.' My dad, for added effect said, 'Your hand doesn't count.' FML
    OUCH! XD

    Today, while working on a carpentry project with my friend at 2am, and enjoying some beers, I cut my hand and realized I needed medical attention. Neither of us being in driving shape, I knocked on my parents bedroom door to request a ride. I was told I had to wait for them to "finish." FML
    Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend for the first time, and she asked me if I ever get made fun of in the locker room for my small penis. FML
    Today, I got stoned at a party for the first time. On the drive home I sat at an intersection waiting for the green light for few minutes. I finally realized the green light was never coming. So did the cop behind me. I was at a stop sign. FML
    XD I just find this funny for no reason


    Today, My girlfriend came from behind me and put her hand in my back pockets. I though it was someone trying to take my wallet, I elbowed her in the nose and broke it. FML
    How romantic.

    Today, I was stuck in what I thought was traffic on my way home from work. I started weaving in and out of traffic because it seemed to only be a few cars holding up the line. I get to the front of the line and I'd realized I just weaved through a funeral procession. FML
    ouch


    Today, I called my girlfriend and she answered telling me how amazing the sex was last night and she can't wait to see me later. I didn't see her last night. FML

  10. #10
    etufo is offline Senior Member Always Around
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    Today, I'm playing basketball with my little brother. After jokingly blocking his shot, he turns to me and says "You're a bitch." He's 6. After asking where he heard that word, he responded with "Daddy calls you that when you're not around." FML
    etufo: HS is most likely going to die sooner or later. Who will kill the cool character killer?

    Popo: well, obviously going by that logic, HS will have to kill himself...

 

 
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