Page 1 of 6 123 ... LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 52
  1. #1
    StealDragon's Avatar
    StealDragon is offline Super Moderator Community Builder
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Location
    NCC-1701
    Posts
    13,402

    Default Beauty (Part Deux)

    I haven't made a thread in what feels like a long time and finally having sat on this idea for a while and the time of nascence is upon me. In consecution of my antecedent topic I pose this question. In its abstract nature it seems to elude me exactly how much weight to assign to physical attractiveness when choosing a potential relationship prospect. Not-quite-simply-put, my exponentially increasing interest in generally attractive members of the fairer sex, I espy, a rapidly growing disgust with my (arguably) basic desire for someone I find personally attractive. Is this something to feel guilty about? Aren't there more prestigious characteristics to gravitate towards other than outward sex appeal? If there were, why so deep is the mental quagmire I face when I reflect upon the inherent dilemma of not being a psychic and therefore not being cognizant of any other potentially attractive qualities of a prospect other than her just being gorgeous (a term I use loosely with my self diagnosed minor case of Sad Puppy Syndrome) when I find it obscenely evil to judge someone solely on looks without knowledge of anything else about said person?

    Does anyone have an opinion or similar experience with this idea/dilemma?
    No I will not refrain from memorizing random and trivial words in the dictionary and thesaurus.


    I'd like to die with the songs I love stuck in my head. I hope to make the most of these hollow bones we become.
    I raise a toast to the the souls that sang all along. I've been gathering friends to just to make some sounds,
    before the ship goes down, I've been making amends by making the rounds before the whole world ends


    [Chit Chat Specific Forum Rules] // Last Update - Friday March 13, 2009

  2. #2
    mystic_guard_sinoel is offline Senior Member Community Builder
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    The 14th Moon
    Posts
    5,234

    Default

    People like attractive people.

    And there is something wrong with this because?


  3. #3
    be0wulf is offline Senior Member Community Builder
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    Purgatory
    Posts
    3,922

    Default

    And now the topic in layman's words, please.

    Well in finding a prospective mate, the level of physical attractiveness does play an important role. I'm not saying that's all too look for, but if she looks like she fell off the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down...then no. Even if she's like Mother Teresa.

    But of course, personality does play a role. The perfect girlfriend would be one who has a great personality but still retains a reasonable level of attractiveness.

    That is all.


    http://www.chunlikickedme.com

  4. #4
    deuce22 is offline Senior Member Community Builder
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Posts
    4,146

    Default

    Good look means good genes too (typically). So it being considered "shallow" it at the same time means is a more assured way of producing better off springs.


  5. #5
    Saizou is offline Senior Member Always Around
    Join Date
    Jul 2005
    Location
    Helsinki, Finland
    Posts
    1,279

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by StealDragon View Post
    I haven't made a thread in what feels like a long time and finally having sat on this idea for a while and the time of nascence is upon me. In consecution of my antecedent topic I pose this question. In its abstract nature it seems to elude me exactly how much weight to assign to physical attractiveness when choosing a potential relationship prospect.
    That depends on the relationship in question. Or in other words, if it's a one-night-stand, looks are more important than a good personality, but if you're looking for a girlfriend, personality is far more importnant than looks.

    Quote Originally Posted by StealDragon
    Not-quite-simply-put, my exponentially increasing interest in generally attractive members of the fairer sex, I espy, a rapidly growing disgust with my (arguably) basic desire for someone I find personally attractive. Is this something to feel guilty about?
    So what you're basically asking is whether you're supposed to feel guilty about your basic biological urges or not. The obvious answer is no, it's not something that you should feel guilty about.

    Quote Originally Posted by StealDragon
    Aren't there more prestigious characteristics to gravitate towards other than outward sex appeal? If there were, why so deep is the mental quagmire I face when I reflect upon the inherent dilemma of not being a psychic and therefore not being cognizant of any other potentially attractive qualities of a prospect other than her just being gorgeous (a term I use loosely with my self diagnosed minor case of Sad Puppy Syndrome) when I find it obscenely evil to judge someone solely on looks without knowledge of anything else about said person?
    Judge is a strong word, and I don't think that it's entirely appropriate in this context. If you would base your entire assessment of another person's character purely on looks, you would be wrong. However, just because you feel the desire to dance the horizontal tango with someone doesn't mean that you have made any assessement of that person's character. I'm sure that you know of some pretty girl that also happens to be a total bitch.

  6. #6
    StealDragon's Avatar
    StealDragon is offline Super Moderator Community Builder
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Location
    NCC-1701
    Posts
    13,402

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by mystic_guard_sinoel View Post
    People like attractive people.

    And there is something wrong with this because?
    The short reason is its superficial.
    Quote Originally Posted by be0wulf View Post
    And now the topic in layman's words, please.

    Well in finding a prospective mate, the level of physical attractiveness does play an important role. I'm not saying that's all too look for, but if she looks like she fell off the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down...then no. Even if she's like Mother Teresa.
    Thats not fair to her, she didn't choose how she looks or what society or I define as attractive.

    Quote Originally Posted by deuce22 View Post
    Good look means good genes too (typically). So it being considered "shallow" it at the same time means is a more assured way of producing better off springs.
    Yeah.... No.

    Quote Originally Posted by Saizou View Post
    That depends on the relationship in question. Or in other words, if it's a one-night-stand, looks are more important than a good personality, but if you're looking for a girlfriend, personality is far more importnant than looks.
    I don't do one night stands. Thats it exactly though, how am I supposed to find the best personality if thats the most important trait and I'm dividing and conquering based on looks? Should I just settle for someone attractive with a great personality if according to our logic someone less attractive with a perfect personality should be ... well... perfect?


    Judge is a strong word, and I don't think that it's entirely appropriate in this context. If you would base your entire assessment of another person's character purely on looks, you would be wrong. However, just because you feel the desire to dance the horizontal tango with someone doesn't mean that you have made any assessement of that person's character. I'm sure that you know of some pretty girl that also happens to be a total bitch.
    Middle ground!


    I'd like to die with the songs I love stuck in my head. I hope to make the most of these hollow bones we become.
    I raise a toast to the the souls that sang all along. I've been gathering friends to just to make some sounds,
    before the ship goes down, I've been making amends by making the rounds before the whole world ends


    [Chit Chat Specific Forum Rules] // Last Update - Friday March 13, 2009

  7. #7
    silverwmoon is offline Senior Member Always Around
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Location
    in my bed, sleeping
    Posts
    1,941

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by deuce22 View Post
    Good look means good genes too (typically). So it being considered "shallow" it at the same time means is a more assured way of producing better off springs.
    Define good genes?

    My dad fell in love with my mom (or at least I suspect that happened =_= I'm around) and was later extatic to find out she had red-hair genes in her family. To him, those were good genes.

    Also Freckles are considered cute by some but they indicate a greater suseptability to skin cancer. *shrugs* Or how about all those cute girls with glasses?

    (sorry I know you said typically, I'm not trying to jump on you ><)

    attractiveness has it's place, physical attraction or even just mental attraction to a person becomes a catalyst for a greater relationship. While goodness is not exclusive to gorgeous women, neither are humility and dignity to women who don't have super-model bodies. Hell usually people are attracted to people on approximately the same level as they are anyhow.. ('cause damn those pretty boys just don't do much for me ;_; they're nice eye candy though...)

    All in all, I'd say if I start talking to a guy 'cause he's cute or has a face/looks I like? so what? I'm talking to him, if he's a jerk I'll probably quickly become disgusted with him, if he's nice, then it's a bonus. I guess I'm trying to say, I don't think it's a matter of judging someone or feeling bad that you tend to only approach certain people, it's weither you let their looks cloud your judgement once you get to know them. Perhaps I sound crass and cruel, but part of it I think is human nature, we're drawn to certain types of people. Unless you notice someone who looks like they really really need someone to talk to or some help, they're probably doing just fine with their own circle of people and if you're talking to them out of desire to ease your oen guilt about drifting towards one set of people or another, it's more insulting than anything else.

    But please, if someone looks lonely and suicidal.. go talk to them or do something nice to make their day.

    EDIT:: I'm WAY too slow ;_; oh well 'night all

  8. #8
    be0wulf is offline Senior Member Community Builder
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    Purgatory
    Posts
    3,922

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by StealDragon View Post
    The short reason is its superficial.
    Thats not fair to her, she didn't choose how she looks or what society or I define as attractive.
    It's also not fair to you.

    If you go through life trying to make everyone happy, you may be hailed as a saint but you're gonna be leading a pretty miserable life.


    http://www.chunlikickedme.com

  9. #9
    MadDogMike is offline Senior Member Always Around
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Posts
    1,517

    Default

    Here's how I see it:

    1. You see lots of girls, but you don't know any of them. Without knowing any of them you only have one thing to judge them by: physical attributes. You're obviously not going to walk up to the ugliest girl in a room full of physically attractive ones and ask them out. It's just human nature that you would make your first judgement based on the only things that are known to you at that point in time.
    2. You get to know the attractive girl. If their personality sucks then you break up and start searching again. If their personality is great then you continue the relationship.
    3. If you happen to get to know some other girls along the way who are not so physcially attractive but they have nice personalities, you may grow to like one of them and decide to be with them instead.

    I don't think it's evil unless you stop after #1. Personally I am attracted to cute girls (not so much "hot" or "sexy" ones), but I would never be able to have a relationship with one if they didn't have a personality that suited me, so that means that personality is more important to me than looks.

  10. #10
    dizzcity is offline Senior Member Long Time Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Location
    Singapore
    Posts
    891

    Default

    Coming from a slightly different point of view, my question in reply would be: how long do you define a "potential relationship prospect"? If it's for life, then consider the following question: Would you still be willing to wake up to the face of that girl in 50 years' time? People's looks may not change that much in 2-3 years (which seems to be the average length of relationships among youth and young adults nowadays, sad to say...), but try imagining the 60-year-old face of every attractive girl you see, and then reconsider why you are attracted to her.

    -Dizzy-
    Manga Genre Focus: Romance, Comedy, Slice-of-life. Primarily shounen, then seinen and shoujo.
    Currently watching:

 

 
Page 1 of 6 123 ... LastLast

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
vBulletin Skin by: ForumThemes.com
Powered by vBulletin® Version 4.2.0
Copyright © 2014 vBulletin Solutions, Inc. All rights reserved.
SEO by vBSEO 3.6.0 PL2

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80 81 82 83 84 85 86 87 88 89 90 91 92 93 94 95 96 97 98 99 100 101 102 103 104 105 106 107 108 109 110 111 112 113 114 115 116 117 118 119 120 121 122 123 124 125 126 127 128 129 130 131 132 133 134 135 136 137 138 139 140 141 142 143 144 145 146 147 148 149 150 151 152 153 154 155 156 157 158 159 160 161 162