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  1. #1
    SAND_MAN is offline Senior Member Always Around
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    The 1/4 Mile

    Default You Know You're Arab When...

    You know you're an Arab when:

    - Your mother yells at the top of her lungs to call you to dinner even if you're in the next room.

    - You arrive one or two hours late to a party and think it's normal.

    - You are standing next to the largest suitcases at the Airport.

    - You talk for an hour at the front door when leaving someone's house.

    - You say bye 17 times on the phone.

    - Your parents still scream at the top of their lungs when making long distance calls.

    - Your relatives alone could populate a small city.

    - You always say "open the light" instead of "turn the light on".

    - You've had a shoe thrown at you by your mother.

    - When your parents meet strangers and talk for a few minutes, you discover they know one of your uncles back home.

    - Your mother does everything for you if you are male.

    - You do all the housework and cooking if you are female

    - You refer to your dad's friends as Amoo.

    - You still came back home to live with your parents after you graduate.

    - You have an endless supply of pistachios, dates, and pumpkin seeds. . .

    - Your parents say you're becoming westernized anytime you get into trouble.

    - You curse at your teachers or strangers in Arabic.

    - You have at least thirty cousins.

    - You teach Westerners swearwords in your Arabic.

    - Your parents want you to become a doctor or engineer.

    - You use your forehead and eyebrows to point something out. . .

    - Your parents drink 6 cups of tea a day.

    - You can spot an Arab a mile away and they have spotted you because they keep staring.

    - After a family meal, the women fight to the death over who should wash the dishes while the men sit on their behinds and discuss politics, waiting for their tea.

    -You wear more cologne than deodorant.

    -You fight over who pays the dinner bill.

    -Your father swears at you with words that effect himself (Ibnil Kalb).

    -At weddings it takes the bride and groom 4 hoursto kiss all the guests.

    -You "get down" from the car instead of "getting out" of it.

    - You have a difficult Arabic name so you come up with an Americanized version of it like "Sam" or "Mike."

    -You have a Sitto always cooking for you

    -You ask your dad a simple question, and he answers by telling the story of how he used to walk miles just to get to school

    -You hug and kiss relatives you have never seen before in your life

    -You flip out when someone mistakes you for a Mexican or Indian. (in my case columbian)

    -You have at least 5 friends named Mohamed

    -Getting a visa to Europe or the USA is like having a baby. Everyone says “Mabrook!”

    -Your friends tell you to be quiet when you are on the phone with your family because now you are screaming at the top of your lungs.

    -You hide everything from your parents

    -If you are male, you only date Westerners and even secretly get engaged to one to scare your family, until you finally end up marrying an Arabic girl.

    -If you are female, every guy you know dates Western girls who walk all over him, then when he's finally ready to get married, he comes to ask for you.

    "Let my ears hear not but the most sinful of lyrics"

  2. #2
    Viraten is offline Senior Member Respected Member
    Join Date
    Oct 2006


    I'm not an Arab but a lot of that applies to me.
    'No need to take me seriously. It's a forum.'

    I <3 the Village People. Everyone wants be a macho man. And join the Navy. And stay at the YMCA.

    <Viraten> It's better than Naruto
    <Chiza> Most things are.

  3. #3
    Urameshi-sama is offline Senior Member Community Builder
    Join Date
    Jun 2006


    ^Same. I have a ton of Asian friends who all of this applies to then except for the cursing in Arabic part, and the Mabrook part.

  4. #4
    StealDragon's Avatar
    StealDragon is offline Super Moderator Community Builder
    Join Date
    Apr 2005


    ummm... Mohammed is the most common name in the world.

    I'd like to die with the songs I love stuck in my head. I hope to make the most of these hollow bones we become.
    I raise a toast to the the souls that sang all along. I've been gathering friends to just to make some sounds,
    before the ship goes down, I've been making amends by making the rounds before the whole world ends

    [Chit Chat Specific Forum Rules] // Last Update - Friday March 13, 2009

  5. #5
    MojoMunkeez is offline Senior Member Community Builder
    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Bay Area


    This applies to Asians, as well.
    And, socially speaking, it's much "cooler" to be Asian than Arab, so you lose.

  6. #6
    98abaile's Avatar
    98abaile is offline Senior Member Community Builder
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    An Englishman in a shithole somewhere in Wales.


    Quote Originally Posted by SAND_MAN View Post
    -You ask your dad a simple question, and he answers by telling the story of how he used to walk miles just to get to school
    I lol'd at this one. It seems like every time I try to have a conversation with my dad, it turns into a lecture.

  7. #7
    Urameshi-sama is offline Senior Member Community Builder
    Join Date
    Jun 2006


    ^That happens to me too. My dad does talk a lot about how he had to walk miles to get to school and had an hour commute to just get there and back. If only I cared...

  8. #8
    Chizabubble is offline Senior Member Always Around
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Not at the computer.


    ^My dad even managed to walk miles, bare-foot through snow. Even though It never snows here.

    I love Steal! <3

  9. #9
    pentaelemental is offline Senior Member Always Around
    Join Date
    Oct 2005


    Arabs and Asians have a lot in common and a lot in differences. Thinking about Chinese history and geography, the silk road contains a mix of Arabic and Chinese culture. Cultural studies are fun.

    Also, Dads think they had the hard way of life, but the Grampas say that they had an even harder way of life. Family-but-really-about-social-relationship-including-friends-and-relatives studies are fun.

  10. #10
    Sensimilija is offline Senior Member Always Around
    Join Date
    Mar 2005
    HBG 042


    Quote Originally Posted by MojoMunkeez View Post
    This applies to Asians, as well.
    And, socially speaking, it's much "cooler" to be Asian than Arab, so you lose.
    Um Arabs are Asians too. And its way "cooler" to be an Arab then a Chinese.

    Im bosnian, but this goes for me to, 99% of it. Heck I live in Sweden and I say Open The lights ( when I speak swedish) instead of turn on the lights haha, and it goes for all my Arabic friends to lol. hahaha so true. I saw a simmiliar list with, you know if your a Bosniak when, I found it again lol.

    Your grandpa has a shot of Rakija for breakfast. And one before lunch. And one before dinner. And one before bedtime.

    -At least one family member makes his own Wine

    - At least one family member makes their own 150 proof moonshine (rakija/sljivovica)

    -"Rakija" is used not only to celebrate at all occasions, but to cure illness and as a massage lotion as well

    -Your parents were at the function where you got drunk*

    -The majority of your friends are also your relatives, even if they aren't your relatives, because you refer to their parents as "Teta"(aunt) and "Striko"(uncle)

    -You knew that the words "dat cu ti ja ______ " when you were asking for something not only meant that you could not have it, but that you might get beat if you asked again*

    -When you come home from school with your report card, instead of getting a reward for bringing home all "A's" (like your American friends), your parents are angry that you didn't get "A+'s" like Stipe did*

    -Wooden spoons (Kuhaće) are not only used for stirring when cooking... they are also used by Mama to beat you when there is no "šiba" handy*

    -At least once before you've told your parents that you'll call the police to report "child abuse" and each time your parents said "Samo probaj"(just try) (you knew full well that "samo probaj" was a warning, and that if you actually did, they'd probably kill you before the arrival of the police)*

    -When Mama gave you the evil eye in public you knew it meant you could expect to be beat within the hour*

    -Mama beat you in public on at least one occasion*

    -If you were having dinner at someone's house and you got pinched under the table, you knew you'd get beat in the car on the way home (are we seeing a pattern here?)*

    -When leaving the house to go out, you always receive the same warnings regardless of age: -"Pazi šta radiš" (watch what you're doing) -"Pamet u glavu" (be smart) -"Nemoj me sramotit" (don't embarass me) -"Nemoj da ja šta cujem"*(i better not hear anything...)

    -Sadly, if something actually does happen, somehow Mama will know before you make it home (baba hotline?)*

    -Mama gets pissed off at you for bringing home McDonald's saying, "sta ce ti taj junk?"*

    -Mama cries when she watches Oprah

    -Tata(dad) insists that watching Oprah is stupid

    -he later sits down to watch cartoons (but pretends to be reading the paper)*

    -If you're in a rush to get somewhere, and you see a "SR" or "YU" bumper sticker on a car while you're driving, you'll go out of your way to follow the car regardless of the fact you're late

    -You know that in addition to fruit flavoured Jello, that gelatin can also be prepared with pigs feet and that's called Hladetina

    -You know that in order to smuggle 'domaca sljivovica' into America without having it detected you have to bottle it in plastic bottles

    -At parent teacher conference you find out that Mama gave your teacher permission to beat you

    -Your relatives in Bosnia think it's strange if you are not married by the age of 24*

    -Your parents insist that you'll end up a nobody if you don't graduate from "fakultet"*

    -When going to banquets, weddings or out clubbing you drink before hand and you bring your own supply of liquor. Later you find yourself dancing on a table with your tie around your forehead.

    -Tata insists that drinking 10 beers, 10 shots and then driving home is not "drinking & driving"

    -You believe Tata's philosophy

    -Dinner on a Sunday has more courses than Americans have for Christmas or Thanksgiving dinner*

    -Though Baba is 98 years old and 4 feet tall she downs a litre of red wine every night with dinner

    -You love "pasteta", but don't like bringing it to school or work for lunch

    -The words "Baba Roga" paralyse you with fear

    - You know that you are a Bosniak when your 12 year old little sister can outdrink any American
    "Reality is wrong. Dreams are for real" - Tupac Shakur (1971-1996)


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