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  1. #21
    ジャキー [JLee] is offline Member Frequent Poster
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    Here's two..I HOPE you like them..=/

    Texas Builds It Larger

    A Texan, while visiting Toronto, found himself in the back seat of a taxi cab on the way to his hotel. Passing by the Royal York the Texan asked the cab driver "What's that building there?" "That's the Royal York Hotel" replied the cabbie. "The Royal York? How long did it take to build that?" asked the Texan. "About 12 years" replied the cabbie.

    "12 years? We build 'em twice as high, twice as wide and four times as long down in Texas, and we do that in six months."

    A while later the cab driver makes his was past the Metro-Toronto Convention Centre. "What's that building over there?" asked the Texan. "That's the Metro-Toronto Convention Centre" replied the cabbie. "Convention Centre? How long'd it take to build that?" asked the Texan. "About three years" replied the cabbie. "Three years? We build 'em twice as high, three times as long and four times as wide as that down in Texas, and it only takes us about two weeks."

    Shortly thereafter the cabbie drives past the CN Tower. "What's that building there?" asks the Texan, pointing at the tower. "Danged if I know" replied the cabbie, "It wasn't here when I drove by yesterday."


    A Story Behind A Gun

    Big Louie the Torpedo was becoming increasingly curious about one of the newer members of his mob, Benny the Rod. Benny had been in the business for many years in another part of the country. During that time he had garnered quite a reputation for being the most conscientious and honorable hit man available. He was also considered quite eccentric, perhaps odd, in that for the last ten years or so he always kept one hand in his pocket - clutching his cold steel weapon in readiness (hence the nickname, Benny the Rod).

    When Benny arrived at Louie's office, the question was put to him.

    "So what's the story with you and this here gun of yours, eh? Like, are you scared or somethin' or you just want to always be ready or what?"

    "Not scared ..." Benny growled, "been doin' it dis way ever since me sister's weddin' 'bout ten ten years ago now".

    "Oh yeah? ... so ...?"

    "Well, I used ta know her fiance at da time - a no good chisler. He never even loved the goil so much ... but he made her happy and so I kept me mouth shut about it", Benny explained.

    Louie leaned in, expecting the point of the matter.

    "And since dat time I gotta do it dis way".

    "But WHY?!", Louie finally demanded?

    "Well, I was at da wedding", grumbled Benny, and I wasn't about to say nuttin' about it then, so now I gotta do like da preacher said ...

    "Speak Now or Forever Hold Your Piece!"

  2. #22
    mystic_guard_sinoel is offline Senior Member Community Builder
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    We don't have to joke about how much Canada owns Texas; it's a given. And the second one, really wasn't that funny either.


  3. #23
    ジャキー [JLee] is offline Member Frequent Poster
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    Wow..You read fast..And geez..I'm TRYING ok? Stop criticizing me....=/

  4. #24
    deuce22 is offline Senior Member Community Builder
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    =\ i havent read any of them. The main jokes that i know are racist and/or stereotypical. So i'll stfu now.


  5. #25
    ジャキー [JLee] is offline Member Frequent Poster
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    Actually..Not many of these are racist or stereotype..

  6. #26
    deuce22 is offline Senior Member Community Builder
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    Quote Originally Posted by ジャキー [JLee] View Post
    Actually..Not many of these are racist or stereotype..
    i was talking about me...ahaha. not you. too lazy to read ur jokes. =\


  7. #27
    ジャキー [JLee] is offline Member Frequent Poster
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    Oh right..Haha =P You should read them ^_^ Tell me if you like them or not..=/ I like the first post better..Next upload, I'm gonna get some better ones..>_>

  8. #28
    KyubiNoKitsune is offline Senior Member Respected Member
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    Meh, not funny

  9. #29
    StealDragon's Avatar
    StealDragon is offline Super Moderator Community Builder
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    Quote Originally Posted by deuce22 View Post
    i was talking about me...ahaha. not you. too lazy to read ur jokes. =\
    so then why are you wasting time and space by responding to his thread?


    I'd like to die with the songs I love stuck in my head. I hope to make the most of these hollow bones we become.
    I raise a toast to the the souls that sang all along. I've been gathering friends to just to make some sounds,
    before the ship goes down, I've been making amends by making the rounds before the whole world ends


    [Chit Chat Specific Forum Rules] // Last Update - Friday March 13, 2009

  10. #30
    deuce22 is offline Senior Member Community Builder
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    Quote Originally Posted by StealDragon View Post
    so then why are you wasting time and space by responding to his thread?
    becuz i can. =p besides, it's not like i said i was going to never read them. just atm i was too lazy and still to lazy to read them now.


 

 
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