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  1. #11
    death incarnate is offline Senior Member Always Around
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    Mar 2006
    pg county


    i wonder how he's going to make it into smaller posts and more interesting. plus i saw my friend with that book a couple of months ago i found it was pretty stupid.

  2. #12
    deuce22 is offline Senior Member Community Builder
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    Nov 2006


    ^ you actually read it? holy cow, that thing was SOOOOO long, that post he put is a book itself i swear!

  3. #13
    blizzar180 is offline Senior Member Always Around
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    Jul 2005
    Lakeland, Florida


    The book by Max Brooks is pretty interesting. I'm not worried about a zombie attack, no. But I have a plan just in case now.

  4. #14
    Yummy Lingo is offline Senior Member Long Time Member
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    Oct 2006
    indisposed, stalking adopted father's uncle's son's daughter.....


    god, why does anyone think people are going to read stuff that long unless it's a chapter from some super cool novel....that they want to read.

    zombies, survival guide. words fail me. yup, that's very cliche, but like i said, words fail me.

  5. #15
    DarkAdmiral is offline Junior Member Newbie
    Join Date
    Jun 2006


    Ok heres some more for the guide.

    Supplies: (Did you think youíd go with only the cloths youíre wearing and nothing else?)
    You will need to have stuff to survive, it wont be like a video game where you can go through nothing at all. There are some basic things that you will need to have or get A.S.A.P. if you are to survive the invasion. Fortunately most of the supplies, you will already have at home.
    Canned food and Water- Of course this is a necessity. You have to take care of your body if want to survive the Zombies and your body needs food. Like most people you probably have some canned stuff in your kitchen, not much but it's a start.
    M.R.E.s- Meals Ready to Eat. They are long lasting, portable, and nutritious. If you can get a hold of a couple for emergencies they would be excellent to have.
    Duct Tape- It has many uses. You can use it anything from First Aid to Armor.
    Matches/Flint- Fire is good. It warms you, cooks your food, gives you light, and can even protect you, but be warned if it is not treated with respect it can harm you. You can even use fire to signal to other survivors if you so desire.
    Shovel- Very useful, can bury stuff, dig pits, and even whack Zombies if the need arises.
    Axe- Chop firewood, break down doors, and decapitate Zombies. It's another useful tool like the Shovel.
    First Aid Kit- There are bound to be non-Zombie injuries that this could easily take care of.
    Hammer and Nails- These are useful for barricading yourself inside a building and basic carpentry.
    Lumber- Same as the above.
    Radio- It's a source of information, and if the Zombies hunt by sound you can use it to distract them.
    CB Radio- You can use it to communicate with others and possibly link up with other survivors.
    Aspirin- Painkiller
    Cloths- Unless you want to run around naked....
    Blanket/Towel- Warm yourself at night and dry yourself when wet. Also you can impress others along the lines of "The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy".
    Fuel Stabilizer- Using this you can keep your fuel supply from going bad, making last longer and giving you that much more power.
    Knives- Useful for various tasks, a good knife in the Zombie invasion will be worth its weight in gold, and probably be in more demand than gold too.
    Weapon Harness- You will need some way to comfortably carry your weapons so they're easy to get at.
    Backpack- You can use it to carry your supplies.
    Extra Ammo- You will need to reload your guns sooner or later, and it's easier to reload than to steal a new gun each time you run out of ammo.
    Spare Weapons and Armor- Does it really need explaining?

    Skills: (those useful abilities that you don't have)
    When society collapses and chaos reigns, those who survive will not just be the strongest but the most skilled. The more things you know how to do the better you will be able to handle whatever comes your way. You may survive even if you don't have any useful skills but it will be quite a bit harder for you. Some skills are mainly for urban areas and others are more useful out in the countryside, the mainly urban ones are listed first.
    First Aid- There are still going to be non-Zombie injuries that will have to be taken care of before they get worse and slow you down enough to be Zombie food.
    Lock picking- Knowing this will enable to get through locked doors quietly, instead of destroying them, that way they can be used again if Zombies attack.
    Basic Auto Repair- With this you could get yourself some form of transportation up and running instead of relying on being lucky enough to find working vehicles.
    Hotwiring- The keys most likely won't be in the abandoned vehicles you find, so if you want to get the vehicle running you'll need to hotwire it.
    Gas Siphoning- The pumps wont be working long after the invasion begins so you'll need to know where and how to siphon fuel.
    Basic Carpentry, Bricklaying, Welding, and Construction- These skills would be useful in fortifying your refuge and possibly making weapons and traps.
    Sewing- Useful for basic repair on your cloths and armor. If you need to stitch up a wound this would be useful to know too.
    Marksmanship- Ammo will be limited and all a Zombie needs is one shot to the head to take it down.
    Filling your own Ammo- Ammo will be limited so you may need to make your own.
    Hand-to-Hand Combat- If your weapons are out of reach this is your last defense.
    Gardening/Farming- Food in stores won't last forever, and if you've barricaded yourself inside one with a garden department, you'll have a way to provide more food.
    Traps (all sorts)- Useful for adding some meat to diet and possibly delaying Zombies.
    Plant Identification- Good to know when you're foraging for food, after all you don't want to end up eating Poison Ivy.
    Animal Skinning/Butchering- You don't want to waste anything if you can avoid it. Knowing these skills you can get the most food possible and Skins to cloth yourself with or trade.
    Climbing- If you know how to climb you can reach places where the Zombies can't get you, or take a safer route.
    Cooking- Again you don't want to waste food, or get poisoned. Also your food will taste much better.

    A good source of these skills is Scouts, and other Organizations like F.F.A. along with Ag. classes. You may also want to consider joining up with other people to cover what you don't know. Some skills will be used more than others but the more you know the better.

    On the Hand-to-Hand Combat, it should never come to that. You should always have a weapon on or near you at all times even when bathing. If you must go off for some alone time with a comrade have a third person stand watch, you don't want to be caught with your pants literally down when Zombies attack.

  6. #16
    Jyuu's Avatar
    Jyuu is offline Super Moderator Community Builder
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    Dec 2004


    It's entertaining just to see someone wasting their time like that on a pointless, useless, retarded topic.
    Keep going.

  7. #17
    98abaile's Avatar
    98abaile is offline Senior Member Community Builder
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    An Englishman in a shithole somewhere in Wales.


    Assuming that the subject matter was worth reading anyway (which its not, its pretty boring except for some stand out moments), we'd all go and download the PDF (of the entire book) rather than read these extracts. And the assuming that the topic was worth talking about, we'd probably start a discussion rather than just post extracts and leave others to their own devices. The topic would probably then diverge and a myriad of other related topics discussed, with plenty of humour and enjoyment.

    But don't worry about it, Jyuu is right, we do enjoy seeing you stumble about in your blissful ignorance, but in the same way a small child might enjoy pulling the wings off a butterfly or dragonfly and feeding it to a spider or an ants nest. So please do carry on.
    (kudos to anyone who spots the resident evil reference)

    To at least salvage something from this thread (sorry to spoil your fun Jyuu), this thread is now about what you would do if the world was suddenly hit by a zombie epidemic. Its up to you what movie/game/book the zombies are from.

    I shall start.

    Assuming the zombies were the las plagas from resi 4 (since that was the most recent zombie related thing I have seen/played), the first thing I'd do, is to find some sort of breathing apparatus (since the game hinted that the parasite might be air borne), then I would try to find some way to arm myself, probably with a mêlée weapon since firearms aren't readily available in this country. I could get a weak crossbow (although its only really designed for target practise), but the problem would be retrieving the ammunition.
    I would then try to get back to my home town, since the town nearby where I went to school has its own TA barracks and the school I went to has its own armoury with over 50 mil spec weapons (albeit non-repeating, unless they got their LSWs back), I also know the area quite well and know the best places to set up defencive positions. There are also farmers who are probably armed with shotguns in the area.

  8. #18
    DarkAdmiral is offline Junior Member Newbie
    Join Date
    Jun 2006


    Considering the results I have gotten elsewhere I thought the people here would get a kick out of the guide. I guess I was wrong. Anyway heres another chunk of it.

    Transportation: (on the road again)
    Know matter how many supplies you have stored away you will eventually run out. When that happens you will need to venture somewhere to gather more, and if you have something other than just your feet you can carry much more, faster. Also if you have some form of transportation you could get away from the Zombies if they find your base and besiege it in numbers too many to stop. You will want to keep in mind that many roads will be blocked with vehicles and Zombies.
    Depending on whether you choose to travel by land, air, or water, you have many choices, each with varying levels of danger. Ground is the easiest travel but the most dangerous, air is the hardest but fastest. Water seems like the safest but supplies are limited severely. Whatever medium you choose you have multiple forms of transportation.

    Car- Basically an armored shell, you have good speed and plenty of room to carry stuff. Unfortunately a car is rather loud so it could attract Zombies and the roads will most likely be filled with abandoned or crashed vehicles. You will also need to worry about fuel and Zombies tipping the car over.
    Large Truck/Bus- Noisy and slow, a large vehicle like one of these would have much carry space and plenty of armor to keep Zombies out. Unfortunately they are not very maneuverable and if you came upon a crash you'd plow right into it. Fuel is also a concern
    Construction Equipment- Large and powerful, but slow with little carry ability constriction equipment could plow through almost any obstacle in its path. Unfortunately finding enough fuel would be difficult and the machines are very noisy.
    ATV/Motorcycle/Trike- Very noisy and not as fast as a car while being very open, these are more mobile and easier to conceal. Unfortunately they can't carry as much as a car, but are still pretty fast. Fuel will be a concern
    Bicycle- Light and human powered, a bike is quiet and very maneuverable, you can even pick it up and carry it around blockages in the road. Unfortunately it is only as fast as you can pedal and cant carry very much at all, and it offers no armor from hungry Zombies.

    Animals can also be used for land transportation.

    Horses and other Equines- Horses have plenty of endurance and can make great company. Although they can't carry as much as car they don't need fuel just rest and food. They can even be used as food in an emergency.
    Dogsled- A lot like the horses aside from only being useful in the winter time, dogs would also be loyal, act as an alarm system, and maybe even attack the Zombies. Unfortunately they can be very loud and that may attract the Zombies.

    Aircraft- If you know how to use one you could use some sort of aircraft to quickly cover a lot of ground. You would have to know where to find one and where you would go with it, and fuel would be a big concern. You'd also have to hope there aren't any Zombies inside it or hanging on to the landing gear like a Gremlin. This includes Planes, Helicopters, and Hot Air Balloons.

    Houseboat- Like I said in the Base section it can act as both a base and a means of transportation. Its large and slow, fuel is a must and it is very noisy.
    Motorboat- Basically just a smaller houseboat.
    Speedboat- Small but fast. Very noisy and canít hold as much as the first two. Fuel is a major concern
    Sailboat- Wind powered so it quiet and you donít need fuel. Itís fairly small though so it canít carry much.
    Rowboat- Human powered so its quiet and doesnít need fuel, but its very small and can carry much.
    Raft- Makeshift or rubber its range is limited depending on whether its human powered or motorized. Itís typically small so it canít carry too much.
    Canoe/Kayak- Very quiet and small, they cant carry much but donít need fuel.
    Others- Things like a submarine, naval vessel, or old galleons would be nice since they are well protected and typically well stocked. Unfortunately you need many people and the know how to use them properly.

    Communication: (can you hear me now? can you hear me now?)
    Most humans, aside from being naturally curious and social creatures, will want to know what is still going on in the world, even during a Zombie invasion, and the post office's motto doesn't cover Zombie attacks. If you can communicate with others you can learn where the Zombies are and where it is safe. You can also learn if the Zombies have been totally eradicated. Even if you don't learn anything about Zombie locations, you can learn how to deal with them, or where more people are if you want to hook up with others. Due to the chaos that will insure during a Zombie invasion power will be lost and many forms of long distance communication will go down including the Internet, but there still are other forms of communication.

    Radio- Though its only one way, it is still a good source of information. Also if the Zombies hunt through sound you could use it as a distraction. Unfortunately they may end up going off the air due to destruction caused in the panic.
    CB Radio- One of these can be used to communicate with other people, you can pass along info or possibly hook up with others. The range will vary with location and the model of radio.
    Smoke Signals/Signal Fire- They cant carry as complex messages as other forms of communication but they are also quite a bit simpler to implement. They can be used to show that people are still alive inside a place, but they might attract Zombies.
    Flares- A lot like the above they can be used to "mark" a location. In a pinch they can also be used offensively.
    Messenger Birds/Animals-If you have the time, resources, and the know how, you could set up a large communication network with trained animals

    Communication will also help prevent raiding by other survivors, it will also help with monitoring Zombies, so that you aren't caught off guard, and it will allow for trade to re-emerge. While money will be largely useless, barter will be very popular. If you have the chance you should salvage some jewelry from a store, things like rings that are easy to carry. Weapons, vehicles, medical supplies, booze, and smokes will be in very high demand. If your feeling lucky you could also try pick-pocketing Zombies.

    Well I should be able to fit whats left in another post but I dont know if I should even bother.

  9. #19
    DarkAdmiral is offline Junior Member Newbie
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    Jun 2006


    Oops wrong forum sorry.

  10. #20
    98abaile's Avatar
    98abaile is offline Senior Member Community Builder
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    Sep 2005
    An Englishman in a shithole somewhere in Wales.


    You're still posting it and we're still not reading it. Are you ever gonna learn?


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